Part of the Law of the Gospel is contained in D&C 42.
Verse 22: love thy wife with all thy heart and cleave unto her and none else.
verse 25: he that committed adultery and repents with all his heart AND DOETH IT NO MORE, thou shalt forgive
verse 26: But if he doeth it again, he shall not be forgiven.
Now the interesting part: the next verse (27)says "Thou shalt not speak evil of thy neighbor, nor do him any harm"
Why is that verse there? Is it tagged on to the preceding verses or a new thought?
I was thinking today it is a tag for me and a confirmation to not speak out about the father of my children. What good could ever come from sharing info about him with anyone? I have had someone tell me that his 'getting away with it/kids living with deception' is actually more damning to him because it prolongs his repentance. That is HIS problem not mine; I am done with trying to protect him. His future and standing with God is in his hands not mine.
I have become weary during this election season with the negativity and whining of certain candidates. I want to hear what your positive ideas are; how you can move us forward, not whining about the past actions of someone else.
I notice the same thing in communications with divorced people;it is a red flag to me when I hear the blame game creep into conversations. I do the same thing in my head (and aloud sometimes too, unfortunately). It is not attractive, it is not comfortable, it does not bring peace and I want to overcome the tendency to do it. I think the motivation for this weakness is the pain of being victimized or hurt. I want to feel justified in holding on to and nursing my 'wound'. "I am divorced but it is not my fault; it's somebody else's fault".
I've been re-reading a favorite self-help book, Prescriptions For Living and the author has advice for getting over loss and violation. He was burglarized and for a long time he was angry about the loss until he realized the burglar was still in charge of his thoughts and thus his life. The burglary was not the problem, his thoughts and dwelling on the event was what was causing him pain. He decided to change his thoughts by telling himself that the burglar sold his stuff in order to buy Christmas presents for his own family. It doesn't matter if it is true, it is how he thinks about the situation and this thought brings him peace.
I pondered this and actually prayed for days about how to wrap my little brain around this idea; how could I apply it to my own situation? God is there and He sent me a thought the other day: I will think that my children already know about their dad's problems and that it's O.K., they aren't condemning me; now we can all go on and live a happy life. More importantly, God knows about the situation and has blessed me in every way to be able to overcome it and go forward with a joyful life; whose acceptance do I really care about?
My daily goal is charity; looking upon each of our Father's children as He looks at them. I want to be in the building up and loving business every day. I pray for those lips that never speak guile but are busy speaking and acting on the loving thoughts of my heart.
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2 comments:
This is a nice thought but very difficult to do. I find myself dwelling on unsavory events from my married life. I can't stop thinking about them. I pray for grace to overcome this depressing characteristic. I thought today, "maybe I should tell a priesthood leader and then I could let it go." My Bishop asked me once if Jesus came and told me to go back to the marriage would I do it? I thought of over 25 years of living with inappropriate sex, sex in public places and all the rest that comes with a sex addict. My face became darkened, I shut down emotionally and could only say, "He would never do that..." That Bishop still does not know about the life I lived; he is just worried that I am less than faithful if I can't even say I would go back if Jesus told me to.
A quote from "The Hiding Place":
"It would be a pretty poor father (mother) who would ask his little girl to carry such a heavy load. It's the same way with knowledge. Some knowledge is too heavy for children. When you are older and stronger you can bear it. For now you must trust me to carry it for you."
the Father of Corrie Ten Boom
I can be a big enough parent to shield my children from knowledge that serves no purpose.
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